PGAD February 19, 2010

This could be the sexual fetishist’s dream – but apparently it’s a disorder. I suppose if I had to choose a disorder (not that being anxious and neurotic don’t already count) PGAD would certainly rank among my top 3. So, Persistent Genital Arousal Disorder it is! Imagine being continually aroused with no other form of [...]

Vagina December 12, 2009

Forget “Does my ass look big in these jeans?” and “Do my boobs look ok in this shirt” I’ve discovered a new female neurosis: the vagina – as in “Do you think I have a sexy vagina?” Usually tucked away between legs and under several layers of clothing, the vagina’s day to shine is coming [...]

Boots August 9, 2009

I’m in need of a pair of boots and not just any boots will do. I need them to be big and powerful and ready to kick some serious s—. I need a pair of boots with attitude, ones that don’t take nothin’ from nobody. I need a pair of  door-kicking, wall-trampling, coming-out-all-guns-a-blazing, take-no-prisoner-boots. I [...]

Jealous July 27, 2009

It wasn’t the hot pink fingernails, the convertible Sebring, the MJ screaming out the speakers or even the bleached blonde hair that was mostly bleached and not blonde that made me cringe. Nope, it wasn’t. It was the hot pink fingernails drumming against the driver’s side door of the taupe coloured convertible while listening to [...]

Testosterone July 27, 2009

Temperature must be linked to this male hormone because when the mercury climbs past “slightly warm” every male on the block is howling and scratching at the back gate, including my dog. This week alone I have experienced incendiary relationship-ending arguments, passionate animalistic sex, and my randy pooch chasing down the neighbourhood bitch – Scent [...]

Housewife July 26, 2009

What exactly does “housewife” mean in these modern new-millennia days? In a recent conversation with a male friend, he told me that he wanted a housewife. I was taken aback. Did he mean he wanted a housekeeper? A cook? Someone to iron his shirts? To satisfy him sexually? To laugh at his jokes and rub his feet? [...]

Shoes July 25, 2009

If eyes are the windows to one’s soul and hands are the indicators of one’s mind, then feet, or rather the shoes that adorn them, are the intent of one’s body. Having observed this holy trinity often enough, I’ve come to believe that whatever you put on your feet – you become. Donning my hot pink [...]

Separate Beds July 23, 2009

As far as I can tell, sleeping in seperate beds may be the only way to a long and healthy relationship. Don’t get me wrong, I love sleeping with my boyfriend when sleeping means nocturnal forays into the realm of the big “O”.  But when it comes to actual sleep and my uber important beauty [...]

Facebook July 22, 2009

Really?! I get Facebook but, really, I don’t. Touted as a major innovation in finding that long lost kindergarten friend you used to trade drink boxes with, this premiere (please read with a snotty French accent) social networking site is a banal, contrite cesspool of narcissistic soliloquies. Without neglecting to mention, of course, the unabashed [...]